ok, so i installed kde and when i try to startx i get a error, could not start kdeinit check your installation

Well, just re-install all the kde packages and see
if that takes care of the problem.............

There is a bug in kdemultimedia-3.2.2-2 and kdelibs-3.2.2-3 that crashes arts. You can wait for the fix which is under construction at the moment, or revert to the older versions. These are kdemultimedia-3.2.2-1.pkg.tar.gz and kdelibs-3.2.2-2.pkg.tar.gz. I just took a look and only the newer (broken) packages are on the two main arch servers. Maybe it is too late to revert if all of the mirrors are synched (removing the older packages). Some people have had luck recompiling arts themselves, but it did not work for me. The only symptom for me is thhe annoying crash upon login and a few kde items wont work like the display section of the control panel and k3b, maybe others.

i tried reverting to the older pkgs and still had the same prob, i also had probs installing gnome,

Check out the arch forum, there is a long thread about gnome problems. I don't use it so i don't know.

If you are still getting the arts crash, try adding arts again. Mine is working with the two older kde packages.