Hi there,
1) Depends what you mean by "better".. Better power savings when machine is not in use for extended period of time comes from suspend to disk, since the machine basically shuts completely off. With suspend to RAM, the RAM is still powered up when machine is "off", so there's a slight larger power draw when suspended to RAM. Another thing is, if suspended to RAM, all can be lost if the power goes out or the battery dies (laptops), but with suspend to disk, you can have a power loss yet still resume from suspend.
2) Depends on the BIOS I believe, and the suspend method. Machine BIOS often will have an option(s) for what actions will cause a resume, i.e. a keystroke, a mouse movement, an RTC event (real time clock).. Now, on my own desktop machine, I have it set to resume from RAM by a keystroke (I hit CTRL to wake it) but not mouse (in case I bump mouse, I don't want machine to awake) but my machine will not awake from suspend to disk or from StandBy mode using the keyboard - I have to press power button to resume it. Again, this probably varies by machine.
3) Yes - It's called WOL, or "Wake on LAN", and requires a "magic packet" be broadcast across the network, targeted at the IP and MAC address of the sleeping machine. I'm not sure exactly how to implement this, but I have seen a few recent threads around here on this very topic, so do some research about WOL, and a check of your machine's user manuals or look in the BIOS to see if your machines have this feature.
4) No idea..
Good luck!