When I startx and use KDE 3.1 GkrellM says I have about 250mbs left of ram out of 512mb total. If I startx and use XFwm and open a term then do a startkde, KDE and XFwm run on the same window. So I have the best of both I guess, but doing this GkrellM says I have 400mbs free. I know kde uses more than XFwm but how come when kde and xfwm are running I have more. You would think that kde would still use the same amount as when it runes by itself . If havee done a ps -ax and I don't notice that anything is missing.
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Not sure. Maybe when you run KDE inside of XFwm, KDE is not running its own window manager? If that's the case, the only difference would be having the XF window manager instead of KDE's window manager; XFwm is certainly less memory-intensive.

If that is the only difference maybe I should run KDE through another window manager because I have not noticed that any of the fetures are not working.