GOD. DAMNIT. MICROSOFT.
"WinBoxes: The Latest Volley In The War Against Linux
Nicholas Petreley wrote an April Fool's article about "Winboards", cheap Windows-only motherboards that function like WinModems. While most of Petreley's readers laughed at the absurd concept and moved on, an engineer from Microsoft's R&D labs didn't. Microsoft will embrace and extend this concept to create entire Windows-only computers called "WinBoxes". What started out as an innocent April Fool's gag has turned into Microsoft's latest anti-Linux conspiracy.
Microsoft has inked a secret deal with Compaq to produce a line of WinBoxes. These computers will consist exclusively of specially designed Windows-only "hardware" built into the motherboard. The CPU will handle all of the processing that is usually reserved for external devices in real computers. The motherboard will contain a built-in WinSoundCard(tm), WinHardDriveController(tm), WinEthernetCard(tm), WinVideoCard(tm), and, of course, a WinModem(tm). (These boxes will not support traditional floppy drives, but they will support proprietary MSFloppies(tm) capable of holding 10MB apiece).
During the next few months Compaq will begin to mass-produce WinBoxes. These machines will NOT be advertised as Windows-only brain-dead boxes, instead they will be marketed as inexpensive entry-level machines for unsuspecting novice computer users. Such users probably don't realize that Windows alternatives exist, and even if they knew about alternatives, they would be content to use Windows. Indeed, these users will never have the opportunity to realize that the "Windows-enhanced" logo etched into the case is really a "Windows-only" warning label.
Within a few years, these WinBoxes could quietly spread through the low-end desktop market and, ultimately, go mainstream. Your average computer user won't care that his el cheapo US$199 computer can only run the latest version of Windows Two-Thousand-And-Whatever. Your average Linux hacker will care, but alas, he'll be stuck using an ancient AMD K7 system. "
HIE HITLER! this f*cking serious!