You didn't tell us which telephone you got. Hard to help then.
If you are thinking about a new phone, then you really should consider BT(BlueTooth). No need for connection with any cable. Works like a charm when I send pictures, calendar or catalog items between phone and computer or Palm. Even use BT to connect to the modem in phone to get connected to Internet from my Palm T3. Have an old Sony-Ericsson phone T-610 (still a really good phone). Can even surf without take phone out of pocket.
Should work the same with IR. BT use same protocols as IR. Some phones have USB-connections or serial connections, but I have never used that.
So look at OBEX (or OpenObex) for transfer information between phone and computer.