What is the Funniest Comment You've Ever Seen in Source Code?

jeremy · 02-01-2016, 11:12 AM

The Official LQ Poll Series continues. This time around we're doing another free-form answer poll. What is the funniest comment you've ever seen in source code? If you have it, a link to the repository would be useful, but project and direct quote also work.

--jeremy

dugan · 02-01-2016, 11:16 AM

I didn't look through the source code myself, but this excerpt from Quake 3's is legendary:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fast_i...ew_of_the_code

smallpond · 02-01-2016, 12:35 PM

Kernel has many strange comments. Here's one from nf_nat_proto_unknown.c

Code:

Sorry: we can't help you; if it's not unique, we can't frob
            anything.

rokytnji · 02-01-2016, 01:40 PM

Quote:

You should also get your employer (if you work as a programmer) or your
school, if any, to sign a "copyright disclaimer" for the program, if
necessary. Here is a sample; alter the names:

Yoyodyne, Inc., hereby disclaims all copyright interest in the program
`Gnomovision' (which makes passes at compilers) written by James Hacker.

<signature of Ty Coon>, 1 April 1989
Ty Coon, President of Vice

From the gpl.txt of Ted 2.23

http://www.nllgg.nl/Ted/

That made me grin a little.

rknichols · 02-01-2016, 02:28 PM

I always liked the comment on the longjmp instruction at the heart of the kernel's scheduler:

/* You are not expected to understand this */

Don't know if it's still there.

Myk267 · 02-01-2016, 02:45 PM

https://www.jwz.org/doc/censorzilla.html

Habitual · 02-01-2016, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Myk267

https://www.jwz.org/doc/censorzilla.html

That's rich!
Poorgrammers sure do love the F bomb.

BeaverusIV · 02-01-2016, 03:32 PM

Quote:

//Dear future me. Please forgive me.
//I cant even begin to express how sorry I am.

I've written a few like this...

273 · 02-01-2016, 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeaverusIV

I've written a few like this...

I have done similar:

Code:

default://since the contents of the char array have been validated previously...
			cout<<"you can't program for toffy you idiot!"<<endl;//we should not get here
			break;

I greped for f*** s**t and cr** in the kernel sources and there are plenty of occurrences.

Myk267 · 02-01-2016, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Habitual

That's rich!
Poorgrammers sure do love the F bomb.

I wasn't sure if I needed to provide context for my pick or not. It's not the swears that make it funny to me. It's the mental image of them writing that stuff while the pressure was on to make their big hit in the browser space. Maybe that's the wrong kind of funny.

There's some nerdy things roaming around the NetHack source, but nothing too side splitting.

Keith Hedger · 02-01-2016, 08:42 PM

The old yaboot message for ppc machines:
"Now blessing folder with holy penguin piss"

Habitual · 02-01-2016, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Myk267

I wasn't sure if I needed to provide context for my pick or not. It's not the swears that make it funny to me. It's the mental image of them writing that stuff while the pressure was on to make their big hit in the browser space. Maybe that's the wrong kind of funny.

I had the mental image of Linus "being Linus" on every one of them entries.

josephj · 02-01-2016, 10:47 PM

In some of my programs where an error condition should never happen, I surround an error message for the code that catches it with:

Programmer Malfunction ... Please report bug

Rich Strebendt · 02-02-2016, 11:59 AM

The old Electronic [Telephone] Switching Systems (ESSs) were programmed in a language specially designed for the unique hardware of which the systems were built (c. 1970). The instruction set was unique, with many of the instructions having both the apparent effect (such as adding the numbers in two registers) and side-effects that a programmer could use to good advantage. One day while looking at a particular program module the programmer newly assigned to maintain it noticed an instruction in the program that just did not seem to belong there. It was also the one instruction in the whole module that had a comment on it. The comment was a single word -- "subtle". No-one ever dared remove that line of code.

schneidz · 02-02-2016, 12:09 PM

Quote:

zarro boogs found

bugzilla return statement if 0 bugs in the database.