This is the first "blog" of any kind I've ever had, so it's probably not the greatest...
Just a little snippet about me:
I'd like to consider myself relatively tech-savvy; obviously I use Linux (Arch to be precise; K.I.S.S. FTW), and I enjoy learning new things about computers in general (both software and hardware-related).
This blog is mostly just for whenever I feel like telling the world about my experiences with computers/Linux (or just life in general), or just posting for the hell of it.
Just a little snippet about me:
I'd like to consider myself relatively tech-savvy; obviously I use Linux (Arch to be precise; K.I.S.S. FTW), and I enjoy learning new things about computers in general (both software and hardware-related).
This blog is mostly just for whenever I feel like telling the world about my experiences with computers/Linux (or just life in general), or just posting for the hell of it.
Is ignorance really so bad?
Tags rant
...if it prevents you from going completely bat-sh*t insane?
I willfully avoid topics such as psychology and neuroscience. Why? Because if I actually studied them, they'd shred what last few bits of my worldview I desperately hold on to into tiny pieces. No, scratch that..they'd decimate them into proverbial subatomic particles.
Am I to be considered an "ignorant fool" because of this? Simply because I refuse to swallow the idea that nothing I do really means anything, since it was all destined to happen anyway? Or worse yet, is it "destined" that nothing will become of my life, because I'm "evolutionarily disadvantaged"?
I know this is gonna sound weird, but I feel like nature itself is pressing on me like some kind of massive authority. The above Wikipedia link is a perfect example of reinforcement of my powerlessness. My summary of it: "You're not 'free', you never were 'free', you never will be 'free'. Your thought patterns and feelings have been laid out (at least at their base level) by your genetics. You're about as 'free' as clockwork.".
Basically the feeling I keep getting is basically one of "You'll learn about it and accept it, dammit, and you'll leave behind your old illusions.". This is probably unjustified paranoia, but I don't know what to do about it. I feel depressed as sh*t and oh, guess what, that's what's supposed to happen!
I was predisposed to spiral into depression at this age! I'm supposed to worry about whether or not my actions mean anything! It is required by my nature!
Yeah, it might seem sarcastic, but unfortunately it's probably the truth, or at least very close to it.
I apologize that this blog has basically become my "angst dump", but really I don't feel comfortable posting anywhere else. I've talked my mom to death about it, but she's so locked in her spiritual whatnot (she's one of those crystal/energy healing/matter-is-energy people, and it annoys the sh*t outta me sometimes) that she can't even attempt to see things from my point of view (it's all a conspiracy, don't you know? Yeah, she's like that, too).
I willfully avoid topics such as psychology and neuroscience. Why? Because if I actually studied them, they'd shred what last few bits of my worldview I desperately hold on to into tiny pieces. No, scratch that..they'd decimate them into proverbial subatomic particles.
Am I to be considered an "ignorant fool" because of this? Simply because I refuse to swallow the idea that nothing I do really means anything, since it was all destined to happen anyway? Or worse yet, is it "destined" that nothing will become of my life, because I'm "evolutionarily disadvantaged"?
I know this is gonna sound weird, but I feel like nature itself is pressing on me like some kind of massive authority. The above Wikipedia link is a perfect example of reinforcement of my powerlessness. My summary of it: "You're not 'free', you never were 'free', you never will be 'free'. Your thought patterns and feelings have been laid out (at least at their base level) by your genetics. You're about as 'free' as clockwork.".
Basically the feeling I keep getting is basically one of "You'll learn about it and accept it, dammit, and you'll leave behind your old illusions.". This is probably unjustified paranoia, but I don't know what to do about it. I feel depressed as sh*t and oh, guess what, that's what's supposed to happen!
I was predisposed to spiral into depression at this age! I'm supposed to worry about whether or not my actions mean anything! It is required by my nature! Yeah, it might seem sarcastic, but unfortunately it's probably the truth, or at least very close to it.
I apologize that this blog has basically become my "angst dump", but really I don't feel comfortable posting anywhere else. I've talked my mom to death about it, but she's so locked in her spiritual whatnot (she's one of those crystal/energy healing/matter-is-energy people, and it annoys the sh*t outta me sometimes) that she can't even attempt to see things from my point of view (it's all a conspiracy, don't you know? Yeah, she's like that, too
).Total Comments 5
Comments
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Read the whole response and don't just pick parts out of it to dwell on:
I don't understand you. You have very strong beliefs about things that you don't want to believe. You are completely unmotivated to seek any form of spiritual beliefs because you believe they are bogus and you are completely depressed to only believe in the scientific. You desperately want there to be more to the universe than the 'cold hard truth' but you refuse to listen to anything that would say otherwise.
You are stuck.
You never say anything new.
And you always wine about it.
Honestly, this sounds like depression to me. But you also refuse to seek advice from a professional and you refuse to take medication because both of those options don't line up with your mundane observation based view of the universe.
My advice?
Stop worrying about what the universe does when ultimately nobody has enough power to do anything about it. For example, we might one day have the technology to blow up the sun or even keep it from exploding. However, we don't have that technology now. Nor do we have any technology close. We may be able to throw a few nuclear bombs at it, but it would be nothing more than a mosquito prick.
Do we worry that the sun may randomly explode or fizzle? No. We are comfortable to believe that, from it's current mass, it has more than 5 billion years left in its life. All we care is that it continues to burn during our own life. But all our wishes and technology about the sun are just beliefs. We can't guarantee that it won't do something unexpected. Hell! we couldn't even reasonably determine that the sun isn't intelligent. We aren't next to it, we can't touch it, and without special scientific gear we can't listen to it. How do you know all the RF, Light, and energy it spews out isn't some form of communication? Human religions tell us that we are the only intelligent entities other than 'God' and angels. Do you believe this? I don't. But who am I to say that Religions got that part wrong, they could be right. I will never know and it doesn't affect my life as I don't need to talk to the sun. But I suppose it would be neat if I could. Then again, the sun would probably be disinterested in what I had to say because it probably can't see me here on earth. It's so large, It probably thinks I'm just a pigment of color on the earth.
Anyway, It doesn't matter what you believe as long as you are happy believing it. This is the same with life styles.
One of the main goals of psychology is to help you determine what makes you happy long term. That is, what ever you do won't negatively impact you or others long term.
If thinking about the universe makes you sad, then keep busy and think about more productive things. Talking about things that depress you are only going to make you more sad.
Honestly, If I didn't know better. I would say you get a kick out of reading the responses people type back to you. Which is fine. That's another area of psychology as well. But I would say it's not very nice or healthy to have people care enough to respond to you only to not take their advice. It's a little one sided. Try doing nice things for people that do nice things for you back. That could be as simple as receiving a smile and a thank you. Visit a retirement home and play some music for them. Sit and listen to them. Some old people have amazing stories about life that could teach you a thing or two.
Any way, I think this is the last response I'm ever going to give you on the subject. You've made me stop caring about what you think as it never changes.Posted 12-11-2010 at 09:53 PM by lumak 
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I'll save my sympathy for people with real problems.
Posted 12-12-2010 at 04:52 AM by brianL
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/* NO COMMENT AGAIN */
Posted 12-12-2010 at 07:38 AM by Web31337
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I'm glad I'm not intelligent and/or educated enough to worry about abstract philosophical dilemmas.
Posted 12-12-2010 at 07:50 AM by brianL
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Bad? No more; Where ignorance is bliss, Tis' folly to be wise.
Ode on a Distant Prospect of Eton CollegePosted 12-16-2010 at 07:15 AM by lupusarcanus
