How does one go about to write a "good virus"?

Let me quallify that. . .

Such a piece of coding would have either / or, or both of the following functions:

1. Sound an alarm remotely, soundlevel of which must be extremely loud and not be abled to be changed.

2. Overclock, or run a VERY long process remotely, procedure of which must not be able to be stopped until completed.

Back Story:

I am plagued by a number of gits connecting to my equipment at inopertune times and at will.

The solution is a deterrant to altertheir behaviour, quite clearly - one that comes at a premium. Wasting their time, as they do mine

What say you? Can you be of assistance, please?

set up something that will block gits or only allow them to connect at a given time, or allow x mount at one time to connect blocking out the rest?

beyond that more information is needed how they are connecting, what exactly is a "gits" and by what means do they use to connect to your equipment?

what exactly is your equipment?

...obviously to secure access to that equipment.

What is this "equipment", and why are you unable to secure access to it? You can't close ports, add a firewall (not even a home router?), etc? Is it behind a NAT?

Do note that: a) the rules prohibit us from providing you with the type of technical help you asked for, and b) to give you that help, we'd need these questions (and more, such as "which protocol(s) are these connections using") answered anyway.