yea, re-boot after each change

Did you also try to disable timed log in the GUI settings?

which GUI setting , sorry

I do also run xfce on this mint installation , could i have set something on xfce that i cant see on cinnamon?

I mean for the login settings, wherever you first disabled automatic login. It should be next to it. By GUI I mean Graphical User Interface. Be it Cinnamon or whatever you're using as a graphical environment.

You might have several login programs. MDM, GDM (Gnome display manager) I think they're called. That might be the issue, actually. Perhaps you were trying to change the settings for another login screen.

P.S. Usually this is what happens when you try to install another graphical enviroment to an existing mint distribution, instead of choosing directly what graphical environment you want to use.

well i dont see what your referring to but here is where you enable/disable autoogin

Attachment 20353

Attachment 20354

I shall login to xfce and see if i can find anything (i might even have had gnome running at some point, not sure), cheers

Search for /etc/gdm or /etc/lightdm or some other display manager's (or login manager's) configuration file.
https://wiki.archlinux.org/index.php/Display_manager (here are some display managers, and perhaps you've installed two, if you've installed xfce afterwards - don't know what display manager it comes with)

click away the "automatic..." ?