Get Slax. It's small, fast, and best of all, you're
root, and root is all powerful. That means YOU'RE ALL POWERFUL! Plus, Knoppix mounts all external filesystems read-only by default.
Go
here (link points to Knoppix.net Using FAQ) which tells you how to do it. Good luck!
And btw... if that STILL doesn't work... GET SLAX!