Configuring and using monitoring suites can be seen as a rite of passage in that reliance on your own knowledge, skills and research is required to succeed. And like you as a Linux admin loathe clients telling you just "it's b0rken" (what is?!) you should learn to be precise and verbose in posting your requests and tell us precisely what you have tried and where you failed. In short: show some effort. Until then here's how: start by reading the Zenoss Core Product Documentation then proceed with the Zenoss Wiki HTTP Monitor ZenPack page.
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