how and what ip address do i use in the scan?
Check "man nmap", then ask OK? Look for "octet range address".
how can i use nmap through a proxy?
I would advice you to not use decoys or any stealth scan options.
is it possible to find my friends computer by only knowing his isp?
Not unless you have more details about what "your friend" runs. "Your friend" might not like you scanning, or simply block scans.
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