I am fairly new to or, at least, inexperienced with Android.
Is there a way to make the lock screen actually lock the device -- in other words not allow volume to be changed, WiFi switched on or any of that?

Hi:

If there is a way to lock the device I'm thinking that it should be mentioned in the manual that came with the Android device.
For an Android phone it's in the Settings menu under 'Security and Screen Lock'.

It's a little bit different to lock on a Android tablet.
http://www.dummies.com/consumer-elec...t-lock-screen/

What Android device do you have?

The manual might be online. That's how I found mine.

I turned on my Samsung S7 Edge to see what you meant.

If I hold the side power button . My options are Power off, Reboot, and Emergency Mode (turned off)

Hitting is quickly just puts it standby but it is still powered up to receive calls and notifications. But the password is required to enter back into it for other functions. One can answer calls in standby mode.

I am not hip on what you are asking how ever.

Just checked my screen lock settings. Looks like what I call standby is screen lock. No apps allowed to install is the setting. Notifications allowed is the setting. Looks like lock is a default setting when tapping the side button quickly. Holding it in is the power off where nothing gets through including phone calls.

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Thanks for checking rokytnji.

Next time I fire up my Tablet I'll see how that locks.

What I am asking for is exactly what I posted. Sorry, I don't know how all versions of Android work but on the version I have (6.0) the "lock" screen allows the volume keys to be used (thus, on my device at least, allowing the ring-mode to be changed from silent to audible) and allows a drop-down menu for turning on and off WiFi and other functions. From what I read on the internet this is normal.
What I'm asking is if the above is abnormal or, if it is normal, if anyone knows a way around this.
I'm frankly appalled that I can't lock my device so that, for example, the volume cannot be accidentally triggered or WiFi switched off but still be notified of received messages.

it's normal.

although my guess would be that these functions can be customized or switched off completely.

unfortunately (this being android), the only suggestion i can give is

a) sift through the settings menus
b) have a look on xda-developers (warning: it's a jungle) if something (setting, app, commandline, custom rom...) exists that does what you want.

Thanks for hte confirmation, even though it's depressing.
I have checked through settings, googled and the like and come up with nothing. I was hoping that somebody here may have come up with a trick to get around it.
Really is terrible that, for example, trying to discretely check messages during a meeting one has to have the dexterity of a stage musician to do so without the possibility of accidentally turning on a ring tone, for example.
The more I use Android the more depressed I get and the more I feel like breaking my expensive shiny piece of rubbish and going to a dumb phone and a lightweight laptop with a 4G dongle.

Why not turn off notifications?

Because I want to see notifications -- there's little point oin having a personal communications device if one isn't notified of incoming communications in some way.
What I don't want is to accidentally switch on LOUD notifications and only find out I have done so in a meeting.

I'm using sophos for control of many things and it can also lock individual programs. You might like to look it up and give it a try.
I think it will do all you are asking plus.
Greg

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Thanks, will have to give it a look.