Having the web user as a member of the same group as the group owning the web server files is not a problem. The easiest way to get to the web server files quickly from the home directory is to create a link:
Code:
ln -s /var/www/html /home/user/html
Now when you ftp into the box your default directory is still your home directory (/home/user), but when you type `cd html` you will be at /var/www/html
Will that do what you want it to?