My question: Is there a distro out there that is well-suited to people who like the convenience of having a package manager, but occasionally prefer to compile their own software?

Overall, I'm a happy Debian user, and I like aptitude and Debian's package management system. However, occasionally I prefer to compile software instead of use the package in the repository, either so that I can A) get the absolute latest features, B) optimize for better performance, or C) use a development version on a project that I am helping to code.

That can be a pain in Debian, because then you always have to be real carefully that your next "aptitude install" doesn't install over one of the libraries or software components you compiled. On the other hand, I don't want to completely give up the package manager because I don't want to have to compile ALL 10,000 packages on my system, and I like the stability and security that comes with having an officially maintained repository.

Or maybe what I need is some kind of system / package-manager hack. Not sure.

You can't just use the dpkg or aptitude HOLD function? Or install to /opt on compile? Or maybe create your own local repository and use apt-pinning to give your local repo priority?

Sorry, I'm not a coder and have only really had to compile standalone stuff that I could stick in /opt in Debian.