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lrt2003 05-24-2004 10:26 AM

What do you do when you get rejected? (women!)
'Nough talk about linux for the day.. or not enough, depending on how you answer my question *philosophical, ain't it?*

The dealo.. when I get rejected by women.. a part of me seems to die, or at least fade away, the innocence part.. and will never return. a man who's never been rejected has a lot to lose.. you stop caring about what ppl think, but still are plagued with insecurities.. not by the people you know, but the potential partners.. what they might think.. not the people you currently know..

then, the thoughts, (after the emotional shock).. why didn't she..? what doesn't see in me? do I have to change? is there still a chance?

you can act cool, but deep down, it haunts you the rest of your life.. whenever you meet the person.. it's there.. whenever you talk.. it's going on in the back of your mind..

on the outside it's cool.. you can talk about it.. but it eats away at you.. you can lose it at the person unexpectedly..

how do you react when you get shut down?

sure, a good "mv her newgirl" is good, but you still wanna know why.. do you ask them why, or just let it go?

or, do you just try a LFS so you can ignore everything else, happily content with problems to keep you busy?

ranger_nemo 05-24-2004 11:09 AM

<< >>

Unfortunately, it's in Windows media, but it's still great.

jaz 05-24-2004 11:11 AM

Re: What do you do when you get rejected? (women!)

Originally posted by lrt2003

how do you react when you get shut down?

sure, a good "mv her newgirl" is good, but you still wanna know why.. do you ask them why, or just let it go?

Have you ever worked in sales? I did last year for the first time and the first month my confidence was shot because I couldn't 'close' the deal. I kept blowing it and I let it suck the life out of me...
...then my team lead pulled me aside and told me how good I was and I said why and he said because I keep moving on. He helped me to realize that sales was a NUMBERS game and the more leads I set up the better chance I have to turn some over. He helped me tweak my closing and showed me the problem: I had a smooth opening but when the clients showed interest I became over excited and showed desperation which drove them off. I ended up doing alot better though I dont work there anymore (I hate sales!) but the same can be applied to casual dating. Don't think of it as a one and done deal think of it as a numbers game. You may need to tweak a few things but you can't let one, two or even three girls cause you to hold your head down. Trust me I've dated alot of women and I've been shot down and have had success.

Don't change for anyone.

darkRoom 05-25-2004 10:41 AM

Hey lrt2003, sounds like you've had a bad time recently. It happens to us all at some point, i've had my fair share of rejections.

Its very tempting to take up a LFS project (or similar) as a way to ignore other problems and its a strategy i've adopted before. However i think its important to see projects/learning as not a substitute for social interaction, they should compliment a varied and interesting life. I've sacrificed so much for computers, so many nights of staying in and reading pdf's, programming and learning. Im proud of the things i've taught myself but i've also started to see the limitations of living life in this way.

My advice would be to be focus on the good things, be proud of the things you have learnt or have done. If you suffer from rejection you can still hold you head high. Don't let the experience jade you and carry on until you have made the life that you want for yourself.

and if that doesn't work then try playing unreal tournament for a bit - or at least until you can see it in your head when you go to sleep

jago25_98 05-25-2004 10:43 AM

At least you've tried

I've never asked a girl out

and it's a long wait

lrt2003 05-25-2004 09:22 PM

I have the "courage" (aka stupidty) to go up to them and talk to them.. ask their name, have decent conversations.. ask them out.. etc.. but it doesn't seem to count for much..

statistics, yes, that's the game.. but damn, it hurts once in a while

np complete 05-25-2004 10:27 PM

I now refer you to a book: The Machiavellan Guide To Womanizing

I forget the author since it has been about 5 years since I have seen it. This book had me rolling on the floor

jaz 05-25-2004 10:33 PM

here's the secret:

grow a thick mustache like Burt Reynolds in Smokey and the Bandit or Tom Selleck on Magnum P.I

Get some Old Spice aftershave

grow hair on your chest and buy a polyester shirt and unbutton it to about your midsection. buy about 4 or 5 thin gold chains (make sure one has your zodiac sign) you can get em cheap at pawn shops.

Get some nice tight polyester pants and fake alligator shoes (real ones might scare off the vegan women)

go out and you should be able to score. Get her home and put on Rod Stewarts "Tonights the Night" and buy some cheap wine (preferably Mad Dog)


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