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Old 01-31-2011, 10:12 PM   #1
Registered: Jun 2009
Location: Texas
Distribution: Slackware
Posts: 611

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Post The Sardonic Lamentations of a Pizza Delivery Manager

SEVERE weather is heading into my area overnight and tomorrow.

I just penned this email to my boss. I couldn't believe that I had just written it, so I decided to air it out here ... for no real reason.

I'd have made it a blog post, but I don't think anyone would see it if I did.

Date: Mon, 31 Jan 2011 20:58:32 -0700
From: Adam & 151st Team <store####@########.###> Add To Address Book
Subject: Re: Schools closed on Tues
To: jim.######@##########.###


I don't expect any action from you ... I just need to sound
off on this.

Before I do, I should mention that I've already called off my
school lunch people and beefed up nighttime staffing. We will
have eight on the inside and nine on the road tomorrow night.

Forecast for tomorrow:
"Snow and gusty winds will lead to blizzard conditions at
times. Very cold. High 19F. Winds NNE at 45 to 55 mph. 16 to 20
inches of snow expected."

In my valueless opinion, we're being foolish by opening
tomorrow. I sincerely hope that nobody gets hurt.

You can't deliver pizza in a blizzard. I've never even seen a
real blizzard, but I have seen them on TV, and I am not keen
to drive in one. I will tell my drivers to do so because it's
my job. I will be a hypocrite when I do, though, because I
would never do it myself. We don't want drivers knocking on
doors at night without porch lights on, but we'll send them
out to drive in a blizzard?

In a press release, the Department of Transportation says, "We
do not recommend that you travel on any road tomorrow."

I understand that, despite the weather forecast, the company's
outlook suggests that the sensible thing to do is to proceed
with business as usual until conditions force us to do
otherwise. However, based on that forecast, be advised that I
may have to close my store for delivery once my drivers have
all died, been injured, otherwise wrecked their cars, gone
missing, or gotten stuck. I may actually close once I have
only one driver left, since I will need someone to sweep and
mop the floor.

Adam (####)
Old 01-31-2011, 11:31 PM   #2
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This sounds pretty serious. Does the company have some sort of legal department you could talk to?
Old 02-01-2011, 12:10 AM   #3
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Location: Waaaaay out West Texas
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Osha requirements for small businesses driving in severe winter conditions in Oregon are studded tires and snow chains.

Page 8 of online Pdf document.


Unless your boss equips his drivers with this equipment. They are covered by osha safety rules to not be on the road as a employee safety hazard. You will have to check osha rules for your state though to see how your guys are covered. Note the osha rules for chains or studded tires for vehicles under 10,000 lbs.

Edit: Just noticed you're a fellow Texan.

Last edited by rokytnji; 02-01-2011 at 12:20 AM.
Old 02-01-2011, 08:37 AM   #4
Registered: Jun 2009
Location: Texas
Distribution: Slackware
Posts: 611

Original Poster
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Originally Posted by win32sux View Post
This sounds pretty serious. Does the company have some sort of legal department you could talk to?
The company is national, and all weather closings are decided on by a guy who works in Oklahoma.

We are specifically forbidden from requesting or suggesting that we be closed early due to extreme weather.

Of course, we are also open on Thanksgiving day, despite only doing a couple of hundred dollars in sales, and actually losing money by staying open.

It's a company that doesn't care about its workers.


blizzard, humor, morbid, pizza, snow

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