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corp769 03-14-2011 02:48 PM

The $RANDOM Thread!
 
Ok guys and gals, this thread is for the complete random and complete insane posts.... I am computer programmer who likes to have fun, and that being said, I love a good laugh here and there. Without entertainment and laughter, I would not be myself.... So to start this thread off with a kick, there are 10 people who understand this thread: those who do, and those who don't. Begin... I want a good laugh each time I log into LQ!

Josh

To edit the above - It's not just for me either - This is a giant community, and I would expect everyone to get a laugh.

EricTRA 03-14-2011 03:01 PM

Hello,

I'm always in for a laugh, but the problem is that although I consider myself funny (sometimes) I cannot remember any jokes. I imagine that comes with the short time memory my mother got for me. Have to step out and get some RAM upgrade one of these days.
On the other hand, after troubleshooting the failing RAM it might also not be a bad idea to contract a programmer to wipe the Alzheimer cells from my brain, that is, as long as he/she doesn't infect me with the stuxnet botnet. Then, considering that might not be that bad as long as they don't disconnect me from the net until I've met the white bunny (rabbit) that resides at the end of the tunnel.

NEXT!

Kind regards,

Eric

corp769 03-14-2011 03:02 PM

LOL... So then you wouldn't want me to turn black hat on you for the time being, huh?

EricTRA 03-14-2011 03:04 PM

It's all grey in here dude!

corp769 03-14-2011 03:05 PM

Haha, yeah, grey like your hair? Oh my bad, you don't have any. That's a good thing then, huh?

EricTRA 03-14-2011 03:09 PM

Yep, shave every weekend, saves me lots of time in the morning!

corp769 03-14-2011 03:10 PM

I shave my head almost every day.... I hate my receding hair line :(

PrinceCruise 03-14-2011 03:18 PM

I like to move it move it...I like to MOVE IT !!!

Wait...my cursor's hung, it's not moving anymore :o :p

Jeebizz 03-14-2011 03:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by corp769 (Post 4290577)
I shave my head almost every day.... I hate my receding hair line :(

Some would say bald is beautiful, strive to be like brianL and you can go far with the ladies :p. Anyways at least you aren't graying at an early age. I'm only in my late 20s now but already getting some strands of gray in my hair.

In keeping with the thread title, some one-liners:

"Live today! Procrastinate tomorrow!"

corp769 03-14-2011 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeebizz (Post 4290591)
Some would say bald is beautiful, strive to be like brianL and you can go far with the ladies :p. Anyways at least you aren't graying at an early age. I'm only in my late 20s now but already getting some strands of gray in my hair.

In keeping with the thread title, some one-liners:

"Live today! Procrastinate tomorrow!"

I like that LOL

And I know how it feels man... If I let it grow out, a few gray hairs DO come out... And mind you, I am about to turn 25 really soon....

Jeebizz 03-14-2011 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by corp769 (Post 4290595)
I like that LOL

And I know how it feels man... If I let it grow out, a few gray hairs DO come out... And mind you, I am about to turn 25 really soon....

Weird, then again my dad was completely gray by the age of 40! I think he was fully gray in his mid 30s, not sure. :eek:

My mum always cuts my hair and started noticing the gray at around 25-26 too (I'm 28 now), it isn't noticeable unless you really look though and it is on my sides only, *shrug*.

"Sham-poo? No thanks, I'll use REAL poo!"...

OH! Guess what today is!? 3-14-2011.... 3-14 -> 3.14, happy Pi day everybody!
Attachment 6404

corp769 03-14-2011 03:27 PM

Yeah that's where the gray's come in for me too, on the sides.

And the pie is awesome! LOL

Alexvader 03-14-2011 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by corp769 (Post 4290536)
Ok guys and gals, this thread is for the complete random and complete insane posts.... I am computer programmer who likes to have fun, and that being said, I love a good laugh here and there. Without entertainment and laughter, I would not be myself.... So to start this thread off with a kick, there are 10 people who understand this thread: those who do, and those who don't. Begin... I want a good laugh each time I log into LQ!

Josh

To edit the above - It's not just for me either - This is a giant community, and I would expect everyone to get a laugh.

I'd say more... there are 11 kinds people out there, the 10 you refered plus 1 who understand binary... :D

corp769 03-14-2011 03:37 PM

LOL Goof.... Ok, so what if someone doesn't understand binary? Then what? We have a problem?

Jeebizz 03-14-2011 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alexvader (Post 4290616)
I'd say more... there are 11 kinds people out there, the 10 you refered plus 1 who understand binary... :D

"There are three kinds of people in the world, those who can count and those who can't."
"5 out of 4 people have trouble with fractions"
"Did you know that a Ten-Gallon Hat only holds ¾ths of a gallon?"

corp769 03-14-2011 03:39 PM

Quote:

"There are three kinds of people in the world, those who can count and those who can't."
I think that's the best yet :D

Jeebizz 03-14-2011 03:45 PM

Some madness perhaps:

"Madness takes it's toll: Please have exact change!"
"I'm just besides myself with schizophrenia!"
"Schizophrenia beats being alone!"


Other:

"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I just made your horn louder."
"Incontinence Hotline: Could you hold please?"

corp769 03-14-2011 03:49 PM

"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I just made your horn louder."

Ha, I should say that the next time I work on someone's car....

Jeebizz 03-14-2011 03:53 PM

Oh man do it, just for the look on their faces... :D

Here's a rather philosophical one:

"What makes teflon stick to the pan?"

Rejected computer message: "Smash forehead on keyboard to continue..."
Rejected Aerosmith song title: "Eat the rich... The poor are tough and stringy!

Other:

"Don't question authority, it hasn't got a clue"

corp769 03-14-2011 04:03 PM

Rejected windows error message: "Error: FOSS detected, now formatting."

lupusarcanus 03-14-2011 04:41 PM

01010100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01110010 01100101 01100001 01100100 00100000 01100111 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01101100 01100001 01110101 01100111 01101000 00100001

corp769 03-14-2011 04:46 PM

Code:

010101000110100001101001011100110010000001110100011010000111001001100101011000010110010000100000011010010111001100100000011010110110010101100101011100000110100101101110011001110010000001101101011001010010000001110100011010000110010100100000011001100010101001100011011010110010000001100001011101110110000101101011011001010010111000101110001011100010111000101110

PrinceCruise 03-14-2011 04:47 PM

$ sudo lspv -l hdisk1
password : ******************************

ERROR 4350:5677 : Isn't it too long for me, eat shit and die!

corp769 03-14-2011 04:49 PM

casper@ltp01[/home/casper/TEMP][15:55] - skdfksadbfksdfhgbadsfhgbdhfsgblkj
zsh - F*ck you, I don't do that.

lupusarcanus 03-14-2011 04:58 PM

When I first saw the title for this thread I thought of H_TexMex_H.

corp769 03-14-2011 05:00 PM

LOL I thought of him when I started to type the $.....

lupusarcanus 03-14-2011 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by corp769
Linux is dominant. Period.

There are three periods in that sentence. Wait, they are all in a row. That's an ellipsis...¹ WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?!

/end silly semantic pondering :p

¹Yes, I'm so pro I just did that.

Slackyman 03-14-2011 05:17 PM

PHP Code:

read PRESIDENT
case $PRESIDENT in
  
"Bush")
    
exec PreventiveWar
    
;;
  
"Obama")
    echo 
"Yes, we can!"
    
;;
  
"Berlusconi")
    
exec BungaBunga & > /dev/null
    
;;
esac 


MrCode 03-14-2011 08:03 PM

Why do I get the feeling that the mods won't let this thread last long?

Anyways...

Squirrel! :D

EDIT: "on-topic":

Code:

[mrcode@lappy486 ~]$ echo $RANDOM
5427

:scratch:

Jeebizz 03-14-2011 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrCode (Post 4290908)


Badger!
:D

-edit

Flying Squirrels!
:D

silvyus_06 03-14-2011 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeebizz (Post 4290620)
"There are three kinds of people in the world, those who can count and those who can't."
"5 out of 4 people have trouble with fractions"
"Did you know that a Ten-Gallon Hat only holds ¾ths of a gallon?"

lulzzzing.

lupusarcanus 03-14-2011 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeebizz (Post 4290916)

Jeebizz... Jeebizz... Jeeeeebizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

badgers badgers badgers badgers badgers MUSHROOM MUSHROOM!!
... sometime later ...
A SNAKE?!

lupusarcanus 03-14-2011 11:27 PM

Boredom + OS X speech synthesizer;

Code:

#! /bin/bash

while (true)
do
        B="0"
        while [ "$B" -le "4" ]
                do
                        say "Badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, A MUSHROOM!, A MUSHROOM!"
                        let B=B+1
                done
        say "A SNAKE!, A SNAKE, A SNAKE!"
done

LOL :P

MrCode 03-15-2011 12:14 AM

Boredom + C standard I/O library + inspiration from coreutils. :D

(Seriously, this thread is starting to turn into a clone of "What are you doing now?".)

EDIT: @lupusarcanus I ported your shell script to be *nix compatible:

Code:

#!/bin/bash

while test 1; do
        for ((x = 0; x < 4; x++)); do
                espeak -a 10 -v en-us "Badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, A MUSHROOM!, A MUSHROOM!"
        done
       
        espeak -a 10 -v en-us "A SNAKE!, A SNAKE, A SNAKE!"
done

LOL

corp769 03-15-2011 03:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrCode (Post 4291035)
Boredom + C standard I/O library + inspiration from coreutils. :D

(Seriously, this thread is starting to turn into a clone of "What are you doing now?".)

EDIT: @lupusarcanus I ported your shell script to be *nix compatible:

Code:

#!/bin/bash

while test 1; do
        for ((x = 0; x < 4; x++)); do
                espeak -a 10 -v en-us "Badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, badgers, A MUSHROOM!, A MUSHROOM!"
        done
       
        espeak -a 10 -v en-us "A SNAKE!, A SNAKE, A SNAKE!"
done

LOL

I definitely need to run this after work.... thanks guys LOL

MrCode 03-15-2011 04:53 AM

Quote:

I definitely need to run this after work.... thanks guys LOL
Which one: the shell script, or "no"? ;)

corp769 03-15-2011 01:01 PM

Both LOL

H_TeXMeX_H 03-15-2011 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeebizz (Post 4290591)
I'm only in my late 20s now but already getting some strands of gray in my hair.

Same here, but I refuse to dye my hair. I don't agree with it ... besides, there's usually lead in it.

$RANDOM = Did you know that Schizophrenia (a degenerative disorder whose name means split from reality) is most often confused with split personality disorder (which is no longer considered a disorder, because it was found that all cases where psychologist/psychiatrist-induced).

corp769 03-15-2011 03:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by H_TeXMeX_H (Post 4291767)
Same here, but I refuse to dye my hair. I don't agree with it ... besides, there's usually lead in it.

$RANDOM = Did you know that Schizophrenia (a degenerative disorder whose name means split from reality) is most often confused with split personality disorder (which is no longer considered a disorder, because it was found that all cases where psychologist/psychiatrist-induced).

You know what, I actually knew that, due to the fact that I frequent mental health here and there.............

H_TeXMeX_H 03-15-2011 03:35 PM

I knew that because I took some psychology classes, and I probably will again ... or psychiatry.

corp769 03-15-2011 03:52 PM

Ok, here is my random thread of the day guys....

Run this code, and don't be drinking anything while it's "talking" LOL
Code:

espeak -v de+f1 "gute bute gute lalalalalalalalalala oip oip oip ser glee ser glee bute buten zshisczk bla bla bla lopolopolopololopoplopoplolopolploololpolopolopllplolop zshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczkzshisczk balmlmlmlmlmlmlmlmlmlml eeeee"

eveningsky339 03-15-2011 04:16 PM

An Indian named Chief Bowels lived in a teepee on the reservation. One day he received a letter from the state division of highways that said that they were going to build a freeway and it would go right through where his teepee was located and he would have to move.

He was very upset about this because his ancestors had lived in that exact place for many generations.

He decided to go into town to talk to someone and get them to change the route of the freeway.

He arrived in town but didn't know where to go so he asked someone for directions to the local office of the highway department. He was told to go three blocks straight ahead then turn left for two blocks and it would be on the right.

He went three blocks straight ahead then turned right and went into the building on the left. It was a drugstore.

The druggist asked him if he could help him and the Indian replied. "Bowels no move!"

"Oh," said the druggist. That's no problem. Take this twice a day for a week." he said, as he gave the Indian a bottle of medicine.

The Indian left and one week later the he returned. "Hello," said the druggist. "Did that medicine work?"

"Bowels still no move!" said the Indian.

"Well, well," said the druggist. "It appears that we will have to use something a little stronger. Take this four times a day for a week."

The Indian left and one week later he returned. "Hello again," said the druggist. "How are you doing?"

"Bowels still no move!" said the Indian.

"Oh my goodness!" said the druggist. "This really calls for something drastic. This is the most powerful treatment in existance. Take it eight times a day for a week."

The Indian left and one week later he returned. When the druggist saw him he asked, "bowels move?"

"Bowels have to move" said the Indian. "Teepee full of sh!t."

Source

corp769 03-15-2011 04:20 PM

@eveningsky - LOL, that's a good one. Did you try out my espeak command from above?

H_TeXMeX_H 03-15-2011 04:47 PM

I don't have espeak installed.

corp769 03-15-2011 04:49 PM

Damn... You should go install it.

Jeebizz 03-15-2011 07:48 PM

Ack ack ack!
 
Ack!


Attachment 6417


Ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack: Ack ack ack ack ack ack ack. Aaacckk ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack, ack ack ack ack ack. Ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack, ack ack ack ack ack (ack ack ack ack ack), ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack.

Ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack, ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack. Ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack. Ack ack? Ack!

Ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack ack? Ack ack ack! Ack ack. Ack ack, ack ack ack.


Ack.

MrCode 03-15-2011 10:25 PM

Ack!

Code:

                  #                                           
                    #  #              #                    ###
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    ##              # # #          ####        ######## #  ## 
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      #  ####    ### #  #  #  ##  # #  #        #  ###     
        ##  ############# #  # #                ##  ###     
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            #####  #  #    ## #      #  #  #####    #   
            #  #  #    #      # #      ##  #  #####    #     
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                # ##  #  #    ##          #####  ##         
            ###### #  #        #          # ###  ###         
            ##      # #        #          # ######    ##     
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                # ## ##    ##  # ##    ##    #  ### ####   
  ###        #### # #        ####        # #  ########     
    #####      # ##          ###          #  ###    #     
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                            ########  #                     
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                          #    #######


lupusarcanus 03-15-2011 10:38 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMx1_1z63Zs

corp769 03-15-2011 11:19 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwTZ2...1&feature=fvwp

Jeebizz 03-16-2011 12:33 AM

http://spreadmystaplerandflyaway.ytmnd.com/


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