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Old 11-23-2017, 05:45 AM   #1
hazel
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One born every minute!


I've decided to make this a regular series. After all, it's our duty to add to the gaiety of nations. Those who find it more annoying than amusing can in future ignore all posts with this title.

I received a letter today which said:
Quote:
We are preparing the dispatch of our 20,000 winner's cheque. Look at your name on the cheque below and check that we have spelled your name correctly. YOU MUST check the details we have for you on this cheque for 20,000 that we will dispatch to you should you be a winner in our Prize Draw.
Underneath is a very convincing-looking reproduction cheque with my name on it.

To be fair, it does say (in very small letters) "Cheque is for illustration purposes only". But the intention is obviously to make me think I've won the lottery.
 
Old 11-23-2017, 10:48 AM   #2
Lucko666
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Registered: Apr 2017
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What? You won the lottery?!!

Remember me, your long lost cousin?
 
Old 11-23-2017, 11:03 AM   #3
DavidMcCann
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I'm still getting the occasional email purporting to come from Nigerians wanting me to launder their money, but the other day I got something even better. It told be that the IMF had spare funds to get rid of and had randomly selected people to give them to. All I had to do was to reply with my full personal and bank account details, and, just to reassure me, it was signed Christine Lagarde. Somehow, I wasn't entirely convinced.
 
Old 11-23-2017, 12:29 PM   #4
ChuangTzu
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Darn, all I get are unsolicited requests from Russian women looking for various things that would probably cause infections......

Note: this is not a dig towards Russian women in any way.
 
Old 11-23-2017, 12:36 PM   #5
hazel
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Original Poster
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I get lots of emails in French inviting me to commit adultery to spice up my marriage. Too bad I'm not married!
 
Old 11-23-2017, 03:17 PM   #6
fido_dogstoyevsky
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I just got one from the UN telling me that as a victim of a Nigerian 419 scam I'll be receiving $800,000 US as compensation...
 
Old 11-23-2017, 03:18 PM   #7
fido_dogstoyevsky
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hazel View Post
I get lots of emails in French inviting me to commit adultery to spice up my marriage. Too bad I'm not married!
It's the internet, nobody expects the truth, just lie about it
 
Old 11-23-2017, 04:04 PM   #8
273
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fido_dogstoyevsky View Post
It's the internet, nobody expects the truth, just lie about it
I was about to reply with the old quote "On the internet nobody knows you're a dog". However, some usernames do make me suspicious...
 
Old 11-23-2017, 08:49 PM   #9
frankbell
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I got one today from [gibberish]amazon @ [something not amazon] telling me I had won a $50 gift card; all I had to do to claim was click on the handy link, at a URL of [random string.com].

Last edited by frankbell; 11-23-2017 at 08:51 PM.
 
Old 11-24-2017, 04:49 AM   #10
brianL
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChuangTzu View Post
Darn, all I get are unsolicited requests from Russian women looking for various things that would probably cause infections.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hazel View Post
I get lots of emails in French inviting me to commit adultery
Some people have all the luck!
All I get is Indians using phony names claiming to be from Microsoft, or doing a "Benefits of Lifestyle" survey. That's on the 'phone.
Haven't checked what's in my email spambox. Could be interesting.

Last edited by brianL; 11-24-2017 at 04:56 AM.
 
Old 11-24-2017, 07:45 AM   #11
sundialsvcs
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Ed McMahon (RIP ...) just showed up at my door with a big piece of cardboard and a bunch of people carrying cameras. I told 'em to get lost ...
 
Old 11-24-2017, 09:06 AM   #12
jsbjsb001
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brianL View Post
Some people have all the luck!
...
Haven't checked what's in my email spambox. Could be interesting.
Ain't that the truth brianL,

Get a load of this;

Ananda says,

Quote:
his is not a typical Dating WEBSITE

⇊ NEW MESSAGE From Ananda ⇊

**VIEW FULL ALBUM**

>>>Click Here<<<
Reward.CVS says,

Quote:
A $50 GIFT FOR THE WEEKEND? JUST GIVE YOUR FEEDBACK
Congratulations says,

Quote:
Congrats [my email addr removed] You may have received a SAM'S reward
Dated Jan 1, 1970 at 9:30am - I think I'm a little late for that one

Sabrina says,

Quote:
Hi [my email addr removed] i hate emails, can we talk on facebook or whatsapp?
Ain't I a lucky duck

Shipping Status says,

Quote:
☀WALGREEN : YOUR ORDER HAS ARRIVED .
Click HERE ➡
Funny, don't remember ordering anything from Walgreen!

And finally, I like this one:

Thank you ! says,

Quote:
Click HERE ➡
(titled "[my email addr removed], Amazon has a surprise for you!)

Who thought the Spam folder could be so much fun! :P

Last edited by jsbjsb001; 11-24-2017 at 09:16 AM. Reason: added [QUOTE] marks
 
Old 11-25-2017, 03:22 AM   #13
ondoho
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I don't get any spam!
Seems like I'm missing out on all the fun.
The last time I got any spam was on my old yahoo account which I moved away from for that reason, and now closed completely.
Of my 3 current mail accounts, all 3 Spam folders are empty!
What am I doing wrong?
 
Old 11-25-2017, 11:31 AM   #14
jsbjsb001
Senior Member
 
Registered: Mar 2009
Location: Earth? I would say I hope so but I'm not so sure about that... I could just be a figment of your imagination too.
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I was hoping for a Russian mail order bride!

Edit: That was a joke for the record.

2nd Edit: No offence to any Russian women intended!

Last edited by jsbjsb001; 11-25-2017 at 12:16 PM.
 
Old 11-25-2017, 05:04 PM   #15
GentleThotSeaMonkey
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"CL doesn't work, so send me your direct private address [credit app/address/ph#/...]"

Please be careful about inappropriate jokes, esp. about <country> brides:
Such banter is not appropriate on LQ.
Quote:
Originally Posted by redacted
...you got some prejudice here you want to share?
any ideas how many LQ members and FLOSS developers come from <country>?
IMO you are that close (pinches 2 fingers together) to a reportable incident of posting problematic/harrassment content.
Edit: redacted without hiding my transgression, sorry.


But, back on-track to Internet scams: CL.org ads/replies get tons of:
"CL doesn't work, so send me your direct private address [credit app/address/ph#/...]"

Last edited by GentleThotSeaMonkey; 11-25-2017 at 06:10 PM. Reason: strike my inappropriate quote, sorry
 
  


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