Sign in a bar:

"If you're drinking to forget, please pay in advance."

How clever.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, buddy, why the long face?"

Guys from Scotland, England, Northern Ireland and Wales all walk into a bar. The English guy says, "That's it, I'm out of here." So they all have to leave...

Oh! Sorry, that's a Brexit joke, not a bar joke.

(Maybe just a wee bit too political? Oops!)

Play Bonny!

Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

A cornstalk walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Want to hear a joke?" The corn stalk replies, "I'm all ears!"

A panda walks into a bar that serves food, and orders a meal. Upon finishing, without warning nor provocation, he pulls out a revolver and fires several shots at random, breaking mirrors and windows and frightening other customers. He then puts the revolver away and starts to walk toward the door. The manager stops him, saying, "What do you think you're doing?", to which the panda replies, "I'm a panda. Look it up."

Puzzled, the manager goes back to his office, pulls his dictionary, and finds this entry:

panda (n) A bear-like animal native to Asia. Recognized by its characteristic black and white coat. Eats shoots and leaves.

Sounds like a joke Bojack Horseman would tell!

It also sounds really, really familiar...
HORSE WALKS INTO A BAR

@dogpatch

You missed the comma out! The definition of a panda should have read: as written in a badly punctuated wildlife manual.

See Lynne Truss' book, "Eats Shoots & Leaves. The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation"

Yes... I am that sad sort of person.

Play Bonny!

^ Ah yes, the devil is in the smallest details:

"Let's eat grandpa!"

A remote viewer finds the bar he's looking for.