How to raise a child between agnostic parent and believer relatives?
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Distribution: Debian Wheezy, Jessie, Sid/Experimental, playing with LFS.
Posts: 2,900
Rep:
@Johnsfine.
1. I have never heard of that group.
2. I have been in trouble on this forum only a few weeks ago for actually impressing on someone the need to not spread anti-semitism.
3. I find what you just said extremely offensive.
I/m hoping you haven't abandoned this thread, for IMO your input makes sense and the subject is a real real problem for many people. It's not a big problem for me for I found faith when I was fathering children and simply brought them up to understand God is real, but sometimes allows suffering for the development of character.
Anyway be that as it may, my children grew up with little conflict in their mind as to what was fable and what was truth, and had little difficulty in separating pagan myths from truth also. When they asked the quations I (without disrespecting my parents or in laws) just told them the truth. Eg "this is a fairy story and was invented and written by a human being for the purpose of entertaining other human beings - especially children" They are all grown up now, and at ages between 15 to 18 they made their own decision, logically, for faith in God, and belief of His truths (ie His promises and prophesies had been proven to them and after many questions had been addressed they became believers. They are now in their forties and their children are headed in the same direction.
Perhaps what you are after is only an ideal that despite our fumbling only does work for a few - perhaps it only works for the believers in the one true God, for there is no conflict then.
I hope your children grow up with a strong love for their parents and their peers. Remember this - you have to demonstrate love and respect for your parents and in laws if you are to have any hope of receiving the same from your children. I can guarantee that they will, in part at least, follow your example - so set them a good one.
There are a lot of different sects of Judaism that believe a lot of different things. So I wouldn't be surprised if some Jews believe that. But I had never heard of it before and asked some more knowledgeable Jews who also had never heard of that (3 days).
rebuild the temple in three days came from the mouth of Christ (John 2:19) but the text is clear in mentioning that he spoke of the temple of his body. The Jews do not believe this and in fact he was misquoted (the text in John was misquoted) by some false witnesses at his trial - hope that that helps clear it up
There are a lot of different sects of Judaism that believe a lot of different things. So I wouldn't be surprised if some Jews believe that. But I had never heard of it before and asked some more knowledgeable Jews who also had never heard of that (3 days).
rebuild the temple in three days came from the mouth of Christ (John 2:19) but the text is clear in mentioning that he spoke of the temple of his body. The Jews do not believe this and in fact he was misquoted (the text in John was misquoted) by some false witnesses at his trial - hope that that helps clear it up
So, the girl is now 7 years old and as I hoped she has
turned to be an agnostic.
Whenever the topic of God used to come up I always
replied and still do: "I don't know. No one has seen
God so no one knows whether he really exists or not.
Some people believe that he exists and some don't."
For stone and photo worshipping I told her that some
people believe this stone idol/photo is God but no one
knows for sure.
This has kept her satisfied.
Now the another problem is she has started questioning
other people about their prayers and beliefs. This can
easily result into fights. I have told her not to question
people about God.
All is going well currently w.r.t raising the child in an
agnostic way.
Thank you for all the effort.
Last edited by Aquarius_Girl; 10-08-2020 at 06:49 AM.
Yes I also noticed the resurrection of the thread. (Pun alert! )
Not re-reading the entire history, but instead the more recent update.
Regarding her questioning of her friends, except for the age and the cited results where it's gone poorly, I still feel it's a great idea. Meaning knowledge is good.
I know it's a loaded statement, but I always felt that being raised with something, and deciding that it wasn't my cup of tea, sort of enabled myself and similar friends to be able to look at extremists and be able to roll our eyes, versus get enamored and join them. Meaning we didn't go join Jim Jones and drink Kool-Aide, or hope that aliens were going to resurrect us as they rode by in a comet.
I've also discussed the various religions with a few devout observers, those being Orthodox Jews and Muslims, and learned about their sabbath, their rituals, ... the what's and why's their religion decided the rules and structures which they follow, and further one of them related how they updated things, such as the interpretation as to what constitutes making fire, also known as conducting work, once electricity was introduced.
At least they learned things about their religion. I guess I did too, but I learned the prayers, the rituals, and never the reasons, until I was old enough to ask the occasional priest, "Hey, why is that?" Probably due to parents being blind faith, "Go! ... because you're supposed to" versus instructing. My most sobering knowledge was when I was probably 35 or so and it was after the holidays where my mother lamented people keeping lights up after New Years, and I made a comment about Little Christmas, where my lifelong Catholic mother didn't understand it. So there you go.
Anyways, I don't know. The first assumption/discussion was the title about how to raise your child. Well, 7 seems to be school age, they start solidifying relationships with other kids, reasoning, and discussing topics like this stuff. To me it's not supposed to be a social justice thingy, especially with 7 year old kids, but instead, "Well, this is what I believe to be the way it is. I'm fine. You're fine. We don't need to argue about it."
I try to follow, "don't be such a nightmare that you emotionally scar your kid." We're parents, not friends. We can be friends when they're grownups and they need home buying/child rearing/investment/retirement advice versus religion advice.
I think it is essential for children to know that people disagree about these matters and to accept that as part of the way the world is. Most children should be intelligent enough to understand that, when Mummy and Grandma say different things about God, it is not because someone is lying but because they genuinely disagree.
I would call my father an agnostic and my mother definitely an atheist, but they brought me up to make up my own mind. They never indoctrinated me. I am now a Christian, but I suspect I would not be one if I had had all that gentle-Jesus-meek-and-mild stuff pumped into me when I was a child.
Hi hazel,
Just in case, mind you , since that just might possibly be directed to me, or a few including me, I'd like to remind you that I don't consider myself responsible for what people I will probably never meet chose to believe, but I am fairly heavily invested in my only child, my Son. I have posted and it is most certainly true, that I did not hide my convictions NOR those of Believers from my Son. He is something of a Believer, and that's his choice and his alone. To me teaching the value of Tolerance and validity of Reason is more important to his character than his religious convictions.
I am however deeply invested in how people treat each other and it seems to me that historically Religion harbors far more bullies and sketchy evangelists that atheists. It also concerns me when Science gets perverted for those who at once cast doubting aspersions on Science, and at the same time, try to "prove their Faith" by "hitching a ride". If 99% of Humanity was religious but solely on a personal and private level, you'd not hear a peep from me on this subject.
My battle is with the political power that religions so often seek and exploit. It seems rather rare that the counterpart occurs.
Of course I wasn't thinking about you, Enorbet! You've always struck me as a most civilised opponent. The people I had in mind were the "new atheists", as intolerant a crowd as I've ever come across. Almost anyone in my local church could give them a lesson in toleration.
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