In general I judge a project by updates to both its code and its website. If one or the other are abandoned for more than a few months I don't put myself in a situation depending on its code. I don't blame others for feeling the same. Openly stating that does not mean I am then required to help the project. Ultimately, if someone truly cares about something passionately enough they will find a way and do something to fix it. For example, If I want to help out a project, I'll donate money but I have to really care or need it to do so.

I don't understand this either. How does having more people using XFCE help the developers? Why would they care that you stopped using XFCE?
If they're not updating the web site and, as people here seem to indicate, there are comments all over the internet stating that the lack of updates is driving people away then the obvious conclusion to come to is that the developers don't care. Why should they? They're not getting paid per install so they're likely writing XFCE for fun and for their own benefit.
The developers are not your employees or a company who want your money so why should they behave as if they are?This I agree with.

+1.
Exactly!
To the others, you are entitled to your opinions, however misguided (IMO ).

This may or may not be a good way to decide which software to use but that doesn't mean that the XFCE team are doing anything wrong. It's not their job to make you happy.
I think it's an odd attitude some people have regarding free software that as users they're somehow entitled to features, help or updates from the developers. That is simply not how free anything works in either sense of the word.

I did not imply that they were doing anything wrong, they have their own methodology and that's fine. I'm just saying that for me personally, if I don't see many signs of life, my attitude is that of the above. I as a user and they as a developer disagree on priorities if you will, and that's fine. Neither of us are bad guys.

I'm not sure if this is directed towards me, but if so I think we may differ on what we mean by being entitled. Stating personal requirements for the software you use isn't being entitled. I mean, you're not being entitled if you refuse to use buggy software are you? If you said "I don't use software X because it's too buggy" you are not being entitled, at least to me. Harassing the developers and demanding they get their act together though, that's acting entitled to me. Since my response is to just not use the software in question, I can say that personally speaking I don't feel that I'm acting entitled.

I perhaps ought to have made more separation between my reply yo you and my more general comments. I certainly don't disagree that you're right in using whichever criteria you see fit to decide whether to use software or not.
I have just become aware that we can often criticise open source projects as if they were commercial ones. I deliberately say we because I find myself doing it all the time and having to take a step back.