hoo boy. you're in for a rough ride (i know i was with with my thinkpad x61t).
i can't help you with the video, but i can definitely help you with the wireless.
start with these 2 things:
unzip and untar these. copy the ucode file from iwlwifi-4965-ucode-18.104.22.168 into /lib/firmware.
cd into the iwlwifi-1.2.23 directory and do ./configure, make, and make install.
now type ./load
after rebooting, do this command as root: lsmod | less
see if something referencing 4965 is in there.
now, use a text editor to edit /etc/rc.d/rc.inet1.conf
there's a section about wlan0 in there, find it.
uncomment and add info so that it looks like this:
## Example config information for wlan0. Uncomment the lines you need and fill
## in your info. (You may not need all of these for your wireless network)
#WLAN_IWPRIV="AuthMode=WPAPSK EncrypType=TKIP WPAPSK=example TxRate=0"
change HELLO to the ssid of your wireless lan. keep it inside quotes. change YOURPASS to your WEP key, keep it inside the quotes. make sure your router is set to use WEP first, so we can at least see if the wirelss is working. WPA will come later.
now, reboot and see if you can get online. let me know how it goes! if it fails, we will try installing the mac80211 stuff from intel's site and possibly skipping WEP altogether and just hoping WPA works (i can explain getting WPA to work better than getting WEP to work).
hang in there, it might be a long road.