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This question is far too broad to receive a useful answer. In general, you would pick out a SMTP server, read its documentation, and get it working the way you want it. Entire books can (and have) been written about this, so it's not really a good topic for a forum post. If you have a more specific question, that would be better. Speaking personally, I prefer Postfix but have more experience with sendmail. Mercifully, though, I have not had to administer an SMTP server for a number of years; it's not a trivial job, even for someone experienced.
In answer to your second question, if you run a mail server from a residential IP, it's likely that some sites will consider your mail spam. You may even be violating your ISP's terms of service and thus are at risk for having your service cancelled. If you misconfigure your server to relay mail for anyone, it's likely to become a spam relay and will be blacklisted. If you must run a mail server, get a hosting provider to host it or get a business class network connection so it is not on residential IP space and configure it properly so as to avoid becoming an open relay.
As per the configuration of smtp server is concerned you can get a bunch of guides on google.
I don't have much experience on working with postfix as I use sendmail
As far as spams are concerned, all it depends on port no you use for smtp server which is by default 25 but obviously you can change the port no. to some random port for sendmail and also you can install MailScanner, SpamAssassin, and ClamAV to protect your mail server
Distribution: RHEL, CentOS, Debian, Oracle Solaris 10
You didn't mention on which OS you want to configure mail server.
And if you search on google "how to configure sendmail/postfix on linux" you'll get lots of links. First you can take help for installing and configuring from there. If you face any issues while installing or configuring then again search for that on google, if still that doesn't work then you can take help from here.