Originally Posted by henry pitax
since i'm still a newbie this kind of thing is out of my league
but honestly it's awesome
thanks for the very detailed lesson
This newbie I knew had dial-up internet, MS Windows 95 (In 2003), a 1.2 Gb HDD, 32 MB ram, in a PC he got from a friend, who said itwas still a really good machine. When he clicked the mouse, he would first move the cursor to the right spot, let go of the mouse, and click the button with a pencil eraser tip. One time I asked him to look at his monitor, and he asked, "Is that the big bright thing?". "Yup!", i replied.
I was setting him up with yahoo.com mail, over the phone. He could only go one screen at a time, because every time he would get to a new screen in his browser, he would have to disconnect from the internet, call me on the phone, ask me what to do next, hang up the phone, reconnect with his isp, click what I told him to click, and do it all over again when the next page came up.
So, he gets to the page where you sign up for a new mail account. I was following what he was doing in my browser, at my house. This guy has dial-up, so he can't be online, and talking to me. He calls me up and asks, "What do I click now?" I said, "Jack, seriously, there is only one thing to click on the entire page, 'For New Mail Account Click Here'."
"Should I click that when I get back online?"
"OK, bye. I call you back."
"Hi, Brian? It's Jack again."
"I figured, since it's been you the last eight times the phone rang."
"OK, there's the words, 'First Name', and a typing box next to it. What do I do?"
"Type you first name in the box."
"With the keyboard."
"Is that the thing with letters and numbers, squiglies and OO's, pyramids and stars?"
"I tried that, but the letters don't come up in the box."
"Click the mouse in the box first."
"You're a genius. I'll call you back."
This went on for another hour and a half. I was so happy when Jack called me and asked if he really needed those wires going everywhere from the computer. I said, "No, but it is detrimental to performance if the cables are removed".
"I don't care. Tell me how to do it."
"Do you have a diagonal cutter?"
"If I do, I don't know it."
"Do you have a serrated knife?"
"Yes, I have that."
"Good. Take the serrated knife, and be careful so you don't ruin anything. With a sawing motion, cut the cables off as close to the computer as you can, without causing the connector to fall out. Do the same thing at each device."
"OK, let me call you back."
"It looks so much better, but I can't get the big bright thing to come on."
"Like I said, it's detrimental to performance, but it's better this way."
"DO you really think so?"
"Yes, I do that to all my PCs."
"That makes me fell a lot better about it."
"I always remember what you taught me, Jack: The way something looks, and how a person feels about it, are what's really important. Never mind if it performs any function."
"How could I forget?"
"You you you ..."
"Are you calling me a you-you?"
"No, silly. You you you ..."
"You are calling me a you-you."
"I just can't think of what to call you."
"Call me watever makes you happy."
"OK, you 'Super Stud Muffin'.
"Sorry. How about Sage."
"Sage is good."
"I guess I won't need to call you anymore for help with my computer."
"I'm really sad about that. I was growing to love spending four hours on the phone with you every Saturday morning. And you were always punctual, right at 6:00 am."