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-   -   Linux Jokes (https://www.linuxquestions.org/questions/general-10/linux-jokes-334249/)

ctkroeker 06-22-2005 01:47 PM

Just thought of one,
Why would you want to pay $200+ for M$, if you can get something better (linux) for free.

PerfectReign 06-22-2005 01:55 PM

I've been using as my sig for Usenet the past few weeks:

linux - official windows replacement part

Genesee 06-22-2005 03:22 PM

not really a "joke," but kind of clever:


What if toasters had Operating Systems?

a) Windows toaster:
The windows toaster looks nice, but sometimes it just won't make toast, it
either comes out burnt or raw, or it stops half way through. also, you
have to unplug the toaster, plug it back in again, and wait 5 minutes each
time you want to try and make some toast. For every loaf of bread you buy,
you are forced to buy a license for a new toaster to go with it, and you will
get sued if you let someone else have some of your toast.

b) MAC toaster
The MAC toaster has no settings or controls and it looks very stylish, but
will only accept proprietary size bread which can only be bought from
Apple main dealers at 10 times the price of regular bread. If it breaks
you will have to ship it to a licensed repair shop for service. The toast is
fine except that the size of the bread is so odd, you can't actually eat
the toast it produces, although it does look good.

c) Linux toaster.
The linux toaster looks awful, it has wires crimped together hanging out
of it, and pieces grafted from other toasters. the first time you make
toast with it it burns it, the next time its raw, but after you read the
man pages and invoke the command line, toast -verbose -breadsize 50132
-eject -o z3321 > /dev/toast | more, and it makes perfect toast forever
and never breaks.

kencaz 06-22-2005 03:36 PM

Good one "Genesee" Your right, it's not a joke. It belongs in Scientific American...

KC

Zeloguy 04-03-2009 02:03 PM

Linux Jokes
 
Call me lazy but I just typed in http://www.linuxjokes.com

horrible looking site but some good jokes on there.

Zelo

SyCo123 04-03-2009 03:12 PM

"Besides, I think Slackware sounds better than 'Microsoft,' don't you?"

I always thought Slackware sounds like a brand of incontinent pants.
:D

Crito 04-03-2009 03:25 PM

I've lost my sense of humor anyways.

PenGUiN_6_1 08-11-2009 01:04 PM

Does anyone know when LILO AND GRUB is coming out? The only place that shows it is in 64 bits.

SyCo123 11-12-2009 02:47 PM

Ha ha good one PenGUiN_6_1!

smeezekitty 11-12-2009 03:48 PM

Quote:

Going from DOS to Linux is like trading a glider for an F117
MS-DOS, you can't live with it, you can live without it.
i dont like these jokes.
if i sort linux windows dos by User interface it would be:
Windows
Dos
Linux
if i sort linux windows dos by overall operation it would be:
Dos
Linux
Windows (BSoD)
overall i think Dos is better then linux and linux is better then windowss

XavierP 11-12-2009 04:54 PM

I think you are going to have to specify the version of DOS if you are going to make a claim like that. Linux/Unix is designed for massive amounts of users, DOS for a single user, single PC. Please clarify what it is that makes DOS the bestest in your opinion.

floppywhopper 11-12-2009 04:59 PM

In the early days of DOS Airlines
Bill Gates said

Quote:

No Jumbo jet will ever need more than one engine


floppy

GrapefruiTgirl 11-12-2009 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Genesee (Post 1709177)
not really a "joke," but kind of clever:


What if toasters had Operating Systems?

a) Windows toaster:
The windows toaster looks nice, but sometimes it just won't make toast, it
either comes out burnt or raw, or it stops half way through. also, you
have to unplug the toaster, plug it back in again, and wait 5 minutes each
time you want to try and make some toast. For every loaf of bread you buy,
you are forced to buy a license for a new toaster to go with it, and you will
get sued if you let someone else have some of your toast.

b) MAC toaster
The MAC toaster has no settings or controls and it looks very stylish, but
will only accept proprietary size bread which can only be bought from
Apple main dealers at 10 times the price of regular bread. If it breaks
you will have to ship it to a licensed repair shop for service. The toast is
fine except that the size of the bread is so odd, you can't actually eat
the toast it produces, although it does look good.

c) Linux toaster.
The linux toaster looks awful, it has wires crimped together hanging out
of it, and pieces grafted from other toasters. the first time you make
toast with it it burns it, the next time its raw, but after you read the
man pages and invoke the command line, toast -verbose -breadsize 50132
-eject -o z3321 > /dev/toast | more, and it makes perfect toast forever
and never breaks.

I read that before somewhere, but reading it again gave me a good laugh. I like it :)

smeezekitty 11-12-2009 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by XavierP (Post 3754814)
I think you are going to have to specify the version of DOS if you are going to make a claim like that. Linux/Unix is designed for massive amounts of users, DOS for a single user, single PC. Please clarify what it is that makes DOS the bestest in your opinion.

maybe consider some people like to do one thing at a time on one computer at a time?

XavierP 11-13-2009 03:41 AM

So how does that make DOS superior? I can do one thing at a time on my Linux box...


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