Every now and then I encounter a child being raised correctly and showing some manners!! When I do I do what my elders did when I was a child and thank the child for their manners and give them a coin!! When I was small a " quarter " bought lots of things; but I give out dollar coins that I always have for bus fare. I just read this story about what happens nowadays when old people open their mouths about ill-mannered children!!

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/...icle-1.2991244

My mother was a teacher. She returned to teaching in the mid-1960s, when my brother and I were in our early teens, and taught until the early 1980s.

She said often that the biggest change she saw in that period was this: When she started back as a teacher and a kid got into trouble, the parents would ask the school, "What can we do to help." By the time she retired, that response had turned into, "What have you done to our little darling."

By the way, if you want a vision of torment, consider having your own mother for an Algebra II teacher . . . . Expectations on both sides are way too high.

Actually, I would have, had not my mother ... a lifetime professional teacher, and, if I may say, a truly gifted(!) one ... purposely recused herself. She was determined that she would never teach her own child in a classroom.

(And you can be very sure that she "made sure of our lessons," after she had dutifully cleared our dinner table!)

(Uh huh, to this day, I think that she was ... is ... "one of the good'uns.™")

- - -

Nevertheless, I heartily agree with you: "it used to be that the teacher was understood to be in control of the classroom, and that the parents were in control of the teacher's mission."

I grew up in the country. She had both the Algebra II classes that year. Recusal was not an option.

cousinlucky, you've convinced me to never to to New York again. When will it get better?

I've spent lots of time in New York City--it was a major center for my first employer. I wouldn't live there--it's too big for me--but my experiences there have been generally positive.

It's like any other city. Most of it is okay, but it's got some bad neighborhoods. Because it's a very big city, its bad neighborhoods just happen to be big. It's certainly a lot nicer place to be now than it was in the 1970s.

As for police misconduct. that's always been a thing, and not just in New York City, but "zero tolerance" and "stop and frisk" certainly fed the instincts of the worst element of law enforcement. You will find bent coppers everywhere. Cell phone cameras have made that clear. Heck, where I grew up, the local moonshine still was in the woods behind the courthouse, and everyone knew it.

As my freshman roommate once said of the ROTC officers at my college, "Give some people a flat hat and they think they rule the world."

Okay, I'll bite ... "a flat hat™?!"

Whazzat?

An officer's hat. I didn't mean to be obscure; I apologize.

A picture is worth: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peaked_cap

So they should do what they do in my country: give them a bell-shaped hat! Our policemen are a lot less violent than yours.

To me, in spite of the inevitable "bad apples," police officers are the bravest people on the planet.

"I came home and found my front door standing open. You (and your dog) go in there and find out who's hiding in there."

The car on a lonely stretch of highway pulls over and stops for your blue lights. "You get out of your patrol car and walk up to it, to confront whatever it is you might find."

I admit it. I ain't got the guts to do that sort of thing.

My West Indian family taught me to read and write and do math before I ever got to go kindergarden; as did many families in the 1940's!! Throughout school some of my teachers disliked me because I would dispute facts that they held because I spent some much time reading books at home and in the public library!! I got into a lot of trouble with my algebra teacher in high school because I developed on my own a formula to use for certain equations. My mother and uncle came to the headmasters office and the three of them confronted the teacher who claimed that I could not use the formula in the teachers class because he did not teach it to me!! I later found out that the teacher was written up for giving me failing grades on tests where every answer was correct!! There was also a history teacher in the fourth grade that did not like me disputing his versions of history! After the second time that I proved him wrong he stopped disputing with me.

All large United States cities are dangerous places mostly because of the " drug problems " and the fact that " children " are seldom properly raised anymore!! When I was small every adult had the right to " punish you " for any and all bad behavior; nowadays no one is supposed to " hit children "!! If " proper punishment " is not available what incentive do any children have to behave themselves?? If a woman does not have any proper upbringing how can she properly raise any children?? The woman that beat the old woman with her own cane in the link above, is typical of the " unfit mothers " that New York City is filled with!!

The violent mother has been arrested!!

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/...icle-1.2992758